change is constant

(extracted from my Instagram - @HeartThreadYoga)

This guy. Ragen and I met in May 2017. One month later, my whole entire world was flipped when my precious Vera dog was attacked by two large dogs. She was severely injured, and I was a mess. I told him - you can go, we just started dating, I have no idea what's going to happen, and I'm not sure I can show up for a relationship right now, especially a new one. Without faltering, he stayed. The summer of 2017, the eclipses, the crazy - my world was tossed. Vera was in and out of the hospital, and Ragen was just my rock. When she died in November, my heart was ripped apart - I felt shredded. And there he stood, right by my side, taking it one step at a time. Making sure I ate healthy food, making sure I was sleeping, holding me when the PTSD nightmares of her attack would suddenly and violently come flooding back.

We thought things were getting "back to normal" when we went hiking in March 2018 - Ragen fell and severely broke his wrist/arm. Shattered. As we rushed to the hospital, it started to swell. ER, and all that goes with that - doc said it was the second worse break he had ever seen. We drove together to doctor's appointments, I got to know all of the docs and surgeons, I helped making sure Ragen was fed good food, and taken care of. In August, he was able to go back to work.

Fall of 2018, I wanted to escape winter. It was actually more than a want - it was a need. I felt like if I stayed in Ithaca this winter, something bad was going to happen. And if I left Ithaca in the winter, something amazing a life changing would happen. I've always had great intuition - but how could I leave Ragen? That was really the hardest part of my decision. I left, with tears streaming down my face - when will I see you again?

I was greeted at the retreat center with a need for a kitchen manager - wow! Did I know the guy for that position?! We talked it over, and Ragen came down to Costa Rica - planning to stay with me until April. Maybe you've seen my stories, and how much fun we’ve been having down here! It has really been a gift. This is definitely my new favorite way to winter!

Two weeks ago, Ragen received an amazing job offer from a company in his home town of Louisville, KY that he simply couldn’t refuse. They’ve recruited him, and I am so proud. He’s already there, they flew him back from Costa Rica and he’s already started the job, and I’ll be moving there with him in April. The big shift I felt coming is here!

Ithaca NY - I love you. Thank you for being my home for almost 8 years, thank you for supporting me as a growing yoga teacher. Teaching at Mighty Yoga and Cornell has been dreamy. It’s bittersweet - and time to grow. Time to blossom even more. You’ve been great soil, a place to plant the seeds, to grow, to blossom - and now the seeds blow away! Off into a new land, cradled by love.

Mars Retrograde

Mars moved retrograde yesterday, and there's a full moon tonight. These two events are pretty big in the astrology world, particularly the Mars Retrograde thing - it only happens every 2.5 years, and can spend just a few weeks there or it can spend months there. This time around, it's spending months there - we'll be in this Mars Retrograde until September 2018. 

As I've been chatting with people this week and mentioning the effects of Mars retrograde, it just seems so apparent to me - and other people are picking up on it too! Some of the uninformed reactions to this astrological event include super aggressive attitudes, a quickness to anger, a kind of "F U" attitude in general. It's real possible for us to just hook into that, and go with it - and if you've already done that, I don't really blame you... it's a powerful feeling! However, I've been trying to approach it a little differently, by focusing in this week on grounding down - rooting into the legs, and really feeling stable and secure before making any moves. Like, take a breath before you act or speak. Survey the situation - use the warrior energy for good! Not just like crazy, run onto the field with a spear in a fit of rage, but like focus in, look at some maps, get grounded, make some plans - and then fight your battle. It's so easy to get caught up in the small aggressions of everyday life - someone cuts you off in traffic, or the barista makes your drink wrong... don't waste your warrior spirit on these small things, save it up for the big stuff - like fighting for equal rights, or social justice! 

You'll get to decide what you want to use your warrior energy on, and remember - you can't really inflict change or fight the good fight unless you're rooted and taking care of yourself. As it gets on into summer, and temperatures are hitting the 90's, take some time to cool off. Deep breaths, chilling out in a cooled space, or if you're in Ithaca spend time out at a waterfall! 

No Agenda

There are three big Hindu Deities that sort of "lead the way" for all of the other Gods - Brahma the creator, and Shiva the destroyer, and then there's Vishnu. Vishnu is all about the moment of now. He is not creating anything, he's not destroying anything -  he just is. He loves to bring balance to the moment, particularly balancing out evil in the world. You can find Vishnu inside of you at this very moment, as you take a breath and the notice the pause - that little space between inhaling and exhaling or that little space between exhaling and inhaling. That's it - that little pause, that moment of now, the just be.

How else can this show up for us in our life and particularly on our yoga mat? In class, I've been encouraging participants to approach each moment with a fresh attitude, one that let's go of the idea that there is an agenda, or a plan, or a syllabus - one that invites the moment of now to show up exactly as it needs to be. 

Yum, the sun's a mango!

After a ridiculous amount of days without the sun here in Ithaca (like 18 I think...) and temperatures barely above freezing, the last three days are finally showing us some blue skies and warmer temps! I play softball in the summer, and we had a very first practice for the season this past Sunday under sunny skies and 60 degrees. Driving over to the field I felt stiff, and just kind of... crusty. Putting on the cleats, dusting off the glove, checking out the bats - all felt a little surreal. Then, I was playing catch. Slow at first, then a little quicker - the ball snapping into my glove, then passed to the right to be thrown across the field. With each throw, I felt more alive. I know it might sound silly - as a yoga teacher, I am well aware of my body, however this was different. It was something I hadn't felt in a long time, and it felt SO good! It felt fresh and clean, playful - even innocent. 

I was reminded of another Hanuman story from when he is just a baby monkey god. He wakes up in the morning hungry (I feel you dude, me too...) and looks out the window. Upon noticing the sun, he innocently thinks it is a very ripe, delicious mango, and decides to try to eat it in his childlike wonder. I can just imagine those moments - and we've all had them - where Hanuman felt fresh and new and innocent on his quest. I invite you to look around and try to embrace that feeling as you explore into Spring and all of the wonder that comes with it.     

Perseverance & Persistance

Everywhere I look lately, it seems there's a common theme - a common feeling tone, if you will - of hurry up Spring! Of course here in Ithaca (where it's still super rainy and a bit cold for the season), and also all my social medias - I'm only on Instagram & FB ;) - seem riddled with wishes of something else. Something warmer. Something sunnier. Something more... beach like! 

Now, I'm thinking my Costa Rican friends are continuing to live the dream down there (takes a pause, looks out at the rain, wonders why she's not living in CR... haha), and I'm sure there are a few souls that like this kind of weather. Like I said, this is an overall vibe that I'm picking up on. And it got me thinking. I've been picking a new Hindu Deity to talk/teach about each month - in an effort to connect my students with some of the deeper aspects of yoga philosophy that I find to be really influential - and this month is the monkey god Hanuman.

Hanuman has some crazy stories! Most of them revolve around his love for Rama and Sita, and his deep devotion to them. In one of the stories, Rama's brother gets injured in battle and is dying, so Rama asks Hanuman to find this special herb that can save his brother's life. Hanuman immediately begins the quest to find this special herb. He has no idea what he is looking for, or even where to look frankly, but he keeps going. He keeps persisting, knowing that the magic is right around the corner, it has to be out here somewhere! 

He comes across this mountain, and notices that it is lush and beautiful - it's full of herbs! Now, which one is the cure for the brother's woes? Hanuman has no idea, and also he wants to complete his mission, he wants to save his friend - so he uses his powers and gets really big again (read more about the another time when he got big in my post "hidden strength") He picks up the whole mountain and brings it to Rama, who then saves the brothers life. 

The lesson I'm taking from Hanuman this rainy day is to keep going - keep trying - keep persisting and persevering. Even if you feel a giant mountain is in your way, return back to your breath and notice your inner strength. 

Here's to sunnier skies soon Ithaca!    

R

Hidden Strength

One of the most well known stories about Hanuman is his search for, and rescue of, Sita. Sita is Rama's wife, and Hanuman has a deep devotion to both of them. The whole story is depicted in the great Hindu text Ramayana, and I'll be going more in depth with Sita next month - she'll be the focus of my classes (and blog posts) for May. For now, the basic story is that she was tricked and then captured by Ravana, and held on an island against her will. Hanuman wanted to rescue her, but didn't really know how since she was over on the island, and it'd be hard to infiltrate. He really, really wanted to help, but didn't think that he could. 

Then, Rama reminded Hanuman of his hidden strength - he reminded him of his hidden powers. Hanuman is the son of the wind god Vayu, and has incredible strength that was hidden from him as a child after he tried to eat the sun (more on that in my post "yum, the sun's a mango!). Rama whispered in Hanuman's ear, reminding him of the power from his youth, and suddenly Hanuman grew very large and was able to see out over the ocean to the island of Lanka, where Sita was being held captive. Hanuman took a great leap across the ocean, basically making a split with his strong powerful legs, and this is where the Asana name for split pose comes from - HanumanASANA.

Once Hanuman gets to the island some other things happen (it's a long story!) and he ends up saving Sita, and bringing her back to Rama. The take away I want to highlight about this story - What is your hidden strength? Where are you keeping yourself small? How can you tap into your power? All of us end up with expectations, perceived requirements, masks, assignments that are given to us based on where we live or who we know or the culture we were born into or the gender we were born as. And all of these layers pile up, like Russian nesting dolls, one inside the other. Through practicing meditation and yoga, we can help remove some of those layers, getting a peak into, and access to our true self. And once we get that,  the power and possibilities just open up.

Be big today, take up space, don't stay small! 

xo,

R      

Where does it come from?

The Big Poster Book

of Hindu Deities

Written & Illustrated by Sanjay Patel

When I was in elementary school, I remember learning about Ancient Greek Mythology, and absolutely loving it. I can still remember the coloring book style handouts we would receive from our teacher; I would doodle along as he read the story, totally transfixed by the parables. As I studied yoga, I discovered a whole new set of Gods and Goddesses - the Hindu Deities, whose stories provide the backbone for not only Yoga Philosophy, but also many of the physical poses and postures.

 

*** side note! The poses/postures are called "Asana" - and it's in the name. If you go to a class where the yoga teacher uses any Sanskrit for the yoga postures, you'll hear it - triangle pose = trikonASANA, mountain pose = tadASANA, final resting pose = SavASANA ***  

There's a book that I have wanted for a while - I first saw it at my friend Keri's apartment in NYC. She has all of these really cool, graphically pleasing posters hanging up, and when I asked her about it, she told me they were from The Big Poster Book of Hindu Deities by Sanjay Patel (image above). I received the book as a gift over the holidays, and I've been picking a new Hindu Deity to talk and teach about each month in an effort to connect my students with some of the deeper aspects of yoga philosophy that I find to be really influential. I began in February with Ganesha, March was Krishna, and April has been Hanuman. Everyone in class seems to really be enjoying the link, and some people have even sent me their favorite story or a video tat they've found about the deity I've featured. I love this way of connecting with my class, and wanted to expand that into my digital community - so many of you have taken class with me in the past, whether you used to live in Ithaca, or you've been to a workshop with me, or we've spent a week together in the jungle of Costa Rica!  

I want to stay connected to you, and I hope you will enjoy these blog posts as I delve deeper into the aspects of each deity over the coming months. I'll also be playing catch up on the past deities, Ganesha, Krishna, and we are in Hanuman. Each month is a different Deity, each week a different aspect of them that I find cool or interesting.

Take care, xoxo - 

R

* Sailboat photo by Robert Stokoe from Pexels - https://www.pexels.com/photo/white-boat-on-sea-during-golden-time-717501/

Authenticity & Truth telling...

...the not-so-perfect-and-centered yoga teacher. 

I recently made a list of ten core values that are important to me - it was an exercise to help influence how I run my business. The list: Authenticity, Acceptance, Growth, Fun, Courage, Inner Harmony, Mindfulness, Vibrancy, Community, and Creativity. And there it is, AUTHENTICITY.

I've wondered how much of my personal life to make public - it's an interesting inner dialogue, how to keep my website, facebook, instagram all "professionally focused" on yoga - and the truth is that life is yoga. We hear it all the time, hell, I say it all the time - "what you practice on your mat helps you in the real world." We look to deep breathing to help us through the rough patches, we crack open our hearts to let it all in  - all of life that we get to experience.

This summer has been exceptionally hard for me. On Monday June 12, five days before one of my favorite yoga retreats of the year (Yoga + Wine + Fireflies at Firelight Camps), my 10 year old sweet little munchkin love-of-my-life furrbaby dog Vera was horribly attacked by two really large aggressive dogs. The attack was unprovoked, and came out of no where. We were literally sitting outside of our local coffee shop, and these dogs came charging out of no where, leashed,  but not under the control of the owner, a local homeless man. To read the whole account of what happened please look at the post on my FB page. After a few surgeries, hospital ICU stays (thank you Cornell Animal Hospital!), and 2+ months of recovery, Vera is feeling great. In the past two weeks, we've been able to go on gentle hikes, hang out in the sun (now that her fur has grown to protect the new skin of her scars), and get back to enjoying summer. I am beyond thankful for her continued recovery - there is one lingering mass in her chest that we are monitoring monthly, and hoping it will go away on it's own.

I had a lot of plans for this summer - I was going to create more retreats for the upcoming year, I was going to plan and market more workshops, I was going to begin teaching Prenatal yoga classes online, I was going to plan the dates of my next Yoga Teacher Training - so many plans that were immediately halted, put on to the back burner. This has caused me a sense of shame, stress, and fear around my business. I was trying to get everything lined up to engage with you all more, to be able to bring you the things (yoga classes, meditations, workshops, teacher trainings, retreats) that you've been asking for - and I'm still excited to do that - however, I am just now getting back in to it, and it seems that this year is just flying by. So fast.

It feels heavy - it feels weighted - it feels SO important  - because of, honestly, the money and debt of Vera's injuries. I have received no assistance from the man whose dogs hurt Vera, and I am not expecting to. He is homeless, and has nothing to give. Bitter feelings have been surfacing for me around this - as I try to live and move from love, and then have to face this sour taste in my heart. I am thankful daily for Vera's life, and the support of my community which has come together to raise more than $6000 towards her $10,000 veterinary bill - and yet still I have this new $4000 debt to pay off. And I know that this feeling will pass, this bitterness - it is a conscious decision for me everyday to choose love over grief, compassion over fear.

As I start to get down, as I start to feel the shame around "failing" in my business this summer - I remind myself of the courage, strength, and focus I have displayed. For 2 months, we were at the dog hospital multiple times every week with a new surgery, procedure, or test aiding in Vera's recovery. I am reminded to hold myself in kindness, not to judge, or shame - rather to accept this moment for what it is. The moment of now. Not stuck in the past, nor projecting into the future like "what if...." Just here, now, writing - growing.

Thank you for your continued patience and love - I'm hoping this note will provide a glimpse into the not-so-perfect-and-centered-life of this yoga teacher, and offer you some encouragement when those inevitable tough times come around.

With much love & kindness, xo

Rachel     

PS - some have asked me "how can I help?" - here is the Go Fund Me Link - thank you!               

Ahimsa

"In our daily life, our attention is dispersed. Our body is in one place, our breath is ignored, and our mind is wandering. As soon as we pay attention to our breath, as we breath in, these three things - body, breath, and mind - come together. This can happen in just one or two seconds. You come back to yourself. Your awareness brings these three elements together, and you become fully present in the here and now. You are taking care of your body, you are taking care of your breath, and you are taking care of your mind.  

When you make a soup, you have to add together all of the right ingredients in harmony and let them simmer. Our breath is the broth that brings the different elements together. We bathe spirit and mind in our breath and they become integrated so they are one thing. We are whole.  

We don't need to control our body, mind, and breath. We can just be there for them. We allow them to be themselves. This is non-violence." 

                                                             - from "How to Sit," by Thich Nhat Hanh 

'Failure'

I was reminded (again) today that it is ok to fail.

I was also told this little tidbit - which I absolutely love:

"Please take my advice, I'm not using it." ;)

In every yoga class that I teach, as the participants grit their teeth and clench their jaws and scrunch their toes and muscle into the poses, I ask them "what would happen if you fail? Truly. What would happen if, at this moment, you are not able to do the pose to the level you *think* you should, and instead you meet yourself where you are. You embrace the current moment, for all of it's glory and 'failure'." And as I watch, I see a softening occur. The breath deepens. A smile touches the corners of the face, the hairline and temples relax. You see, it is not really a failure, more of a learning about ourselves moment - how will we react when faced with 'failure' - can we continue to feel love and be love and spread love.

I had set off with lofty goals for the summer, and as we are now approaching August(!) I can definitely take a look back and think - wow, I have really failed at these goals. And this is where I have been for the past month or so. Now, from an outsiders perspective, I haven't failed at all! A successful yoga retreat a few weekends ago, lots of breakthroughs, an awesome live music yoga class that I taught, connections being formed, bonds being created, truly enjoying the summer :) And yet I have been in this place of feeling like "BUT you didn't get x, y, z completed so..."

So. That's just it. So. I'm taking back my power. I will not be paralyzed by the fear of 'failure' - Every new moment, every new breath, is just that - NEW! A chance to grab the reigns and move forward at the pace I choose, noticing how each moment effects the next. To ride the wave of inhale and exhale, to chose to be present with the 'failures' I have - to always choose love over fear.

Look at all these happy yogi's after our live music class with Ley Line on July 26!  

Like attracts Like

I was never one to believe right away - I, in fact, prided myself on not being guiable - that was always my sister Kelli's role ;) When I began practicing yoga, there were a lot of things that I didn't "believe in" at first... like om-ing. I thought the om at the end of class was soooo cheesy and weird. Another thing that I didn't love was savasana - "ugh," I would think, "we just have to LAY here? What a waste of time!" And, in all honesty, I still have trouble lying still sometimes, even after 14 years of practicing savasana! 

What I've discovered for myself over time is that I need to do the things that I know will make me feel better - even if I don't want to - instead of falling back into habit of things that won't. And I've just figured out that, for me, those things are: practicing yoga, meditating, eating healthy, getting plenty of sleep, hiking in the woods, lying in the sun, snuggling with my animals, and surrounding myself with people that are positive and up lifting. As I've invited these things into my life, other things that weren't so desirable began to fall to the side - relationships that weren't fulfilling, habits that I didn't enjoy, and even feelings of self-doubt and negativity that I had towards myself. I began to notice that as I chose to surround myself with inspiration, I then became inspired. Chose to be around people that are kind, I started to be kinder, to love more. Find people that are enchanted with life, and I became enchanted. Of course, it's a process - as my lovely Healthy Aging yoga student Martha says "We call that L-I-F-E, life" - and it's nice to have the evidence in my own life that the law of attraction is a real thing. I hope you are able to find these things for yourself, and enjoy this crazy journey.       

Gratitude

Zoom out.

I learned about the 10,000 ft approach when I was living in Dallas, working for an architecture firm. The idea is, when you're too close to something, when you are really IN IT, it can be hard to see out. Gratitude can be this way - sometimes we forget about the amazing life that we are living because we are in it, every day, every night. Sometimes we just need a little nudge, a reminder to step back and give thanks for the things (even tiny ones - petting a cat, or noticing a pretty flower) that make our day great. It seems overwhelming at first, or maybe even cheesy - and there is evidence that it works!

"Expressing and experiencing gratitude is an important part of any spiritual practice. It opens the heart and activates positive emotional centers in the brain. Regular practice of gratitude can change the way our brain neurons fire into more positive automatic patterns. The positive emotions we evoke can smooth, destress, and broaden our thinking patterns so we develop a larger and more expansive view of our lives. Gratitude is an emotion of connectedness, which reminds us we are part of a larger universe with all living things." 

- Melanie Greeberg, Psychologist

You can try it out this week - You might even start to see the silver lining in the things that "go wrong" or you don't want to do - it's a practice, just like anything else. The thing that we practice is the thing we will get good at :) 

Journey

"Don't stop, believing... Hold on to that feeling..." ok, not that journey - though they are awesome ;) We're talking about the journey of life, the path, whatever you want to call it. What I've noticed in my life is that the same lessons resurface over and over, until they are cleared out and dealt with. It's awesome, because all of our life experiences have brought us to this point, and the things we are thinking, doing, and acting on now will shape our future. Super cool and powerful stuff! It's sounds so simple - we all know this about our journey, and sometimes it's nice to have that reminder.

photo: Lindsay France for Mighty Yoga

Look at all of the smiling faces in this picture! I love it - I love watching each of you on your journey each week :) 

This week I've been asking people in class to think back upon the week and, without judgement, think of one thing per day that was just great, and then offer gratitude to that thing. You can do it too! You might even decide to write down each day's thing - it doesn't have to be a giant thing, just something that you feel was a great part of your day.

There's an awesome lady that attends my healthy aging class at Cornell, and after I asked my class to practice this she said "Rachel, is it ok for me to share mine from Monday?" Of course! She went on to describe how on Monday she had finished an afghan she was making for a friend, she sent it out on Tuesday in the mail, and upon receiving the afghan on Thursday the friend called with all of the most wonderful adjectives to describe how the afghan made her feel. <3 <3 <3

I feel so inspired by that :) and also by this -one of my absolute favorite poems by Mary Oliver:

 "One day you finally knew what you had to do, and began, though the voices around you kept shouting their bad advice, though the whole house began to tremble and you felt the old tug at your ankles. "Mend MY life!" each voice cried.

But you didn't stop.

You knew what you had to do, though the wind pried with it's stiff fingers at the very foundations, though their melancholy was terrible. It was already late enough, and a wild night - the road full of fallen branches and stones.

But little by little, as you left their voices behind, the stars began to burn through the sheets of clouds, and there was a new voice, which you slowly recognized as your own, that kept you company as you strode deeper and deeper into the world, determined to do the only thing you could do - determined to save the only life you could save."

Have a great week everyone! 

Xo, R

Beginner's Mind

I've mentioned it in class before, it's in my bio for Mighty Yoga, and sometimes I feel it breathing down the back of my neck - I'm a "recovering" type-A perfectionist. I've been thinking about this a lot lately in relation to teaching yoga and keeping in touch with those of you who have left Ithaca - I miss you guys! I love making personal connections with people, sharing this awesome practice of yoga with y'all, and I've got some really cool stuff happening that I want to keep you up to date on. I've been thinking, and processing, and trying to figure it out... trying to make it "perfect" - trying to become "an expert" before I put myself out there. And then I was reminded of this Suzuki quote, one of my favorites:  

"In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, in the expert's mind there are few." - Suzuki

So powerful. Beginner's Mind. You do NOT need to know all of the things, all of the time, nor do you need to be doing all of the things at 110% all of the time!

That's what we call burn out ;)

I've created a plan - and I'm really hoping it works - AND it might not. And I'm ok with that! A huge lesson for me in yoga has been to meet myself and my students where we are, on that day, in that moment. I might head to class thinking "ok, I'm going to teach this sequence, in this particular way" and then I get to class, center on the breathe, we begin to move, I read the room and... Listen. Observe. Be in the moment. All the planning goes out the window. So, I am going to try to stick with my plan: keep this blog updated with my weekly yoga themes, yoga tips, inspirations, etc, along with keeping my HeartThreadYoga Instagram account updated, and I've also created a Facebook group where we can all share in our journey together. I'm putting it out there, and we will see what happens. I got some great advice last week: There is no such thing as perfection, so it's useless to strive for perfection. Instead, try for excellence in that moment." 

Thanks for coming along with me on the ride - growing, learning, living!

Much love - xoxo

R